I grew up like most people. Although my parents preferred peace, they still ultimately believed that war could be just and necessary. For a long time, I was the same. But around the time I began college, I began to think about what I believed and who I wanted to become. Beginning a relationship with a girl aspiring to commission into the Space Force especially forced me to confront my emotions about war. I struggled for a long time that year with my convictions, read the history of war, especially modern war, and of its justifications, but in the end I came back to the same point.

Although I want nothing but the best for the people I care about, and for them to never feel pain or suffering, there are certain things which I could not justify doing, no matter the outcome. We are all the same, in some way, in our humanity. And I feel that the only thing that separates myself from anyone else is the happenstance of genetics and life experience. Certain actions, particularly those which strip people of their lives and treat them as undeserving of dignity such as killing, torture, and rape are not justified. Ever. And yet, this is the nature of war. And to hold true to this conviction, I cannot join the military or defense industry, no matter the consequences. I want my life and actions to speak to peace and to love, and for others’ lives to do the same.